Impersonating the Love Guru

How many times do you hear a guy rant about how “all girls” are shallow and don’t care about honesty, trampling all over their hearts. Then the same time here girls talk about how “all guys” act the exact same way. Honestly, I’m sick of it. I feel like the generalization of people dehumanizes them and is just plain immature.

I guess the major root of all this is the bitterness cause by failed relationships (or almost relationships) that seems to completely shape people’s paradigm of the opposite sex. Well, maybe that’s valid… to some degree. However, there are a few generalizations made about guys and girls that have always gotten on my nerves. Here is a few:
All girls friendzone the “good guys”. Ok, there are three problems with this. First of all, most guys who I have heard complain about being ‘friendzoned’ have never bothered to even ASK the girl out. Okay, you cannot complain about that if you don’t even have the guts to be assertive enough and ASK! She is not a mind reader.

 There’s a reason I never root for the best friend in books. You’ve known this girl for years, why suddenly when she’s into someone else you decide to tell her you love her. Like can you not?

Secondly, the other hand is the guys who do ask and the girl tells them she just sees them as a friend and they get mad. She is entitled to her own emotions and you can’t FORCE her to like you back. Some even just say yes out of pity but when there’s nothing there, there’s nothing there. The fact that you complain about that is very selfish and makes me question your ‘nice guy-ness”. This is also connected to the other myth nice guys finish last which isn’t true. Maybe the reason it’s not working with this person because they aren’t the person for you. You “finish last” because the “one” or whatever is the LAST person you decide to pursue and it’s magic.
The last thing wrong with this is girls are friendzoned just as much as guys… just saying.
All guys are jerks/ all girls are shallow. No, they are not. There are really nice people in the world. Yes there are some but if you just step out of your exclusive bubble and got to know new people, you would find them. Make friends with new people. Honestly, some of the best relationships come out of friendships because you’ve already established that sense of trust and not just liking someone based on their outside appearance. My teacher once talked about how stupid first dates are because people come all dolled up, acting like someone they are not and by the time you find out who they are, they are someone completely different. Also, a lot of people who think other people are shallow or jerks liked/dated those people in the first place based on their looks. If it was truly about whom they were, why are you complaining about it later. You’re just as shallow as they are.
Girls and Guys can’t be good friends without falling for each other. This sounds slightly contradictory to my previous point but it’s not, girls and guys CAN be just friends. Yes, some friendships bloom into more, but if every friendship bloomed then there would be no more friends and everyone would be in polygamous relationships. Your significant other should be your best friend, that doesn’t mean your friend will be your significant other. We live in the 21st century and let’s move on from that.  
Cheating. This isn’t so much a myth as it is a problem with relationships. Frankly, I don’t get it. Why do people cheat? Like I understand you finding someone else—which means you didn’t truly love the first person—but I don’t understand why you have to reel that person along while you hang out with others. If you’re over someone, move on. Why hurt them even more by cheating. I would rather be dumped for someone else than cheated on but stayed with. Also, the “other woman (or man)” baffles me. Why would you want a person who cheats. If they cheated on the previous person, they will with you. The whole affair confuses me. (LOL, get it, affair? :D)
Long Distance Relationships don’t work. I honestly can’t speak in certainty about this subject. I haven’t been in one that works but I know of some that have. My conclusion, some do work. It’s possible but it depends on the people. You know yourself. You know whether or not you can handle it.
Love at first sight. Ok, Disney ruined love—though they did finally get it right in Frozen. You cannot love someone by simply seeing them. You can be infatuated with them and then grow into love but not at that moment you met them. If you say you did, you’re a superficial person because honestly, the only thing you have to go on them is their looks.
Opposites Attract. This is both true and false. Yes, people can be attracted to people different from them, out of curiosity and what not. However, you have to have some stuff in common for a relationship to work. It’s just simple logic. However, two people are supposed to complement each other so the differences you DO have should work in harmony with each other.
Happy couples don’t fight. LOL! That’s the biggest lie. If you never fight, that’s actually a sign that something is wrong. Disagreements—when worked out—make a relationship stronger. Whether it’s a romantic one, family one, friendship, etc. People have varying opinions and they clash sometimes, it’s how you deal with it that matters.
Love is butterflies in my stomach. I literally wrote a whole post on this.here

So I guess that’s it. I didn’t mean to turn into a love guru or anything, I’m just tired of all the stupid, failed high school stuff and all.

Anyway, Valentine’s is soon so I guess it sorta fits, but my final thought is not rush relationships. I know you’ve heard it a million times but it’s true, when it’s right and it’s time, it will happen. (and that time is not when you’re 12)







Song of the post: Dear No One by Tory Kelly 













Quote of the Post: Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. -Bruce Lee

Re-evaluating Imagination

I don’t think I’m going to do the whole Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy—well, maybe her—with my kids… if I have any. You must be flabbergasted at that statement. Why would I deprive my future kids of their childhood? Well, why would I encourage some fantasy to my kids that I’m just going destroy and devastate them later on in life? I know that sounds weird—like I’m talking in terms of an adult not a kid, but I never believed in Santa or the Easter Bunny. Nobody told me they weren’t real, I just was a logical child about stuff like that. The only one that got me was the tooth fairy because ‘she’ visited me at a friend’s house and it baffled me how even when I wasn’t home, I still got money.
However, I still had a great childhood. In a way, knowing that it was my parents who put those presents under the tree or hid the chocolate eggs at Easter was better. I mean, even when times were hard and I knew my parents were struggling financially, there would still be gifts on the best day of the year. You can’t help but feel loved. I mean if I wanted say—an iPad—for Christmas, but my parents couldn’t afford it but they get me a bunch of clothes and smaller gifts instead, you know how much they care and the gifts mean so much more. If I believed in Santa, I would feel terrible because…c’mon, it’s SANTA, he’s loaded, where’s my iPad? Being a child, I would be so broken hearted, maybe even throw a tantrum. It’s just not worth the supposed ‘magic’ of believing.
Why should I believe in a mythical creature anyway? What is this magic you speak of? So I believe in a fat old man and his little helpers, or a bunny that somehow has loads of eggs to give—where does he even get the eggs from? He’s like some master thief or something—I digress. Is the magic of the holidays what they represent? Christmas and the gift God gave us, Easter and the Sacrifice He made? Why don’t we encourage this part of the holidays? Why isn’t generosity—‘tis better to give than to receive—, love, joy, thankfulness, etc promoted instead?
Anyway, back to my childhood. I was a happy child. I grew up normally. I know I said I was logical and all, but I also had an imagination. Remember pretending the ground was lava—I still do that—or building a fort/cave thingy-ma-bob out of pillows and couch cushions? That was my thing! I remember pretending to be a spy, a princess, a mum, an animal with my friends. I loved the game of make-believe. I need to be LIED to by my parents in order to have a great childhood.
The long and short of it is, I’m pretend Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, etc are real. I’ll tell them about it, I mean, they still have to watch great movies like The Santa Claus; Elf; Rise of the Guardians, etc, but just for fun, for enjoyment.
Or maybe I’m being overly logical.
Quote of the Post: Imagination is more important than knowledge… Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.—Albert Einstein